A Tinkerers' Tale.

[tripdog123 37]

A little while ago some guy I've never met contacted me and asked if I could 'assemble' - his word - a watch for him - a Rolex GMT 16760. WTF is that ?  I thought .

He said he had all the parts ready, just need to put them together - even said he'd pay me. I thought, why not - just how fucking hard can it be - it just needs to be assembled, right ?  200 euros - easy peasy lemon fucking squeezy and I'll make some spare cash.

 

So the stuff arrives - a case, a Swiss ETA movement that's been converted with a GMT module, a Rolex 'spider' dial (wtf ?),  Rolex insert, and a pile of shit from China -  a bezel assembly, a bracelet, a clasp, a set of hands, a crystal.  All seems to be there - I'll knock it out in an hour and will be laughing all the way to the bank.

 

I thought it wise, all the same, to do a couple of minutes of research first, to find out what exactly this watch should look like once I've assembled it - I wanna do a good job you know, even if I don't really have a clue about watches.

Fuck me, the case he's sent doesn't look anything like the photos on the internet  - the lugs are the wrong shape,  have the wrong profile, the case is covered in scratches and the guy he paid to drill the lug holes ( a 'modder' it seems . . . ) has made a real fucking mess - the holes are oval. . . . oval fucking holes ?

 

So I do some more research (I'm not getting paid for this research shit, and it's starting to bug me - I hated school . . . ) and buy all the bits and pieces I need to reshape the case, re-polish the sides and re-brush all the other bits - Swiss metal files, high speed silicon carbide polishing wheels, a hand held rotary tool, wet and dry paper and jewellers paper from 340 up to 2500 grade, 3 different grades of polishing compounds and the best  rotary polishing felts.

 

By sheer luck I don't fuck it up and the case comes out looking OK. This is gonna be easy, I can feel it.

 

Next I move onto the movement - not familiar with these things, so I pick it up and have a closer look. Fuck me if the the round thing with the numbers on it doesn't fall off in my hand. Then another little shiny metal bit falls on the table - I later learn this is the 'unlocking yoke maintaining plate'. Who knows what the fuck it does.

This is quickly turning into a nightmare - the fucking thing is falling apart in my hands. I decide to see if I can get it to tick - watches tick, right ?

Well not this one, the fucking round thing (crown ?) is not making the stick thing (stem?) move at all - won't even move in our out, never mind windey-unwindey.

 

Fucking nightmare, after more research I discover that something called the  'keyless works' hasn't been assembled correctly and the other parts are from the calendar wheel mechanism - which surprise-fucking-surprise hasn't been assembled properly either. 

Seems some modder cunt has sold him a Swiss ETA that he converted with a GMT module, and made a fucking mess of it.

More fucking research and I dismantle all this shit, find the fucking keyless is fucking filthy dirty and incorrectly assembled. I clean it, re-assemble it and the calendar wheel mechanism, put the stem in and the fucker starts ticking - and I can even change the date and the time. Halle-fucking-lujah. 

 

I then realise I need to know if this fucking thing is going to be accurate - I buy a timegrapher - luckily I did, the fucker is running 40 seconds a day slow. Fucking modder cunt.

Once regulated correctly it's +5 seconds a day.

So, I put the dial on, put the hands on - the second hand won't fit. Bollocks.

 

After more fucking research it seems that the movement has tall cannon pinions which raise the hands above the indices, but the hands supplied are long pipe hands, raising them up too much, and the second hand is a short pipe, which means not enough clearance. Fuck.

Fortunately I managed to find a long pipe second hand down the back of the sofa, along with a pot of non-glow pigment and a pot of binder which allow me to relume the second to exactly the same color and texture as the other hands - pure fucking luck there.

 

Now we're making progress - I'm on a roll - we'll soon be finished, on our way to a cool 200 euros profit.

 

Pop the movement in the case  - aaaaaand the fucking movement ring he's sent is too big for the case - waaaay to big for the case, so it won't fit. Fuck.

So I file away at the outside of it until it fits in the case, pop the movement and the ring in the case, put the movement tabs in, screw them down - and it all fits together and works like a charm. Like I said, easy peasy lemon fucking squeezy - building watches, there really is nothing to it once you get the hang of it. 

 

I try to keep the momentum going. I'll put the crystal and all the bezel assembly shit on there. 

So, get the crystal on, get the retaining ring on, put the bezel ring on - and it won't fucking fit. 

Seems the retaining ring and the bezel ring didn't come from the same manufacturer, so they aren't compatible. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

 

And double bubble fuck, the crystal is stopping the second hand from moving. Because it's a long pipe second hand it's raised it up to the point where it's touching the crystal. I remove the hand, shave off 0.2 mm of the base of the pipe and see if it's enough. Nope, still touching the crystal. Fuck.

I have another look down the back of the sofa - yup, my luck is in - there's a whole bunch of 295 crystal gaskets down there. The gasket on the watch is 2.3 mm, so I choose a 2.5 mm - raising the crystal by 0.2 mm, just enough to let the second hand turn freely. It works, the watch is ticking away nicely and I'm already imagining all the things I'm going to buy with my 200 euros.

 

Fuckety fuckety fuck fuck fuck fuck. Now the fucking crystal retaining ring won't fucking fit  - looks like the gaskets I found down the back of the sofa are made to fucking genuine fucking specifications, and the POS gasket that came with the crystal isn't - it's thinner, by quite a bit, and this coupled with the fact that the retaining ring and bezel ring come from different manufacturers means that now the crystal retaining ring won't fit on the case. 

 

I decide to go all out and by me a fucking lathe - I'm gonna machine this fucking bezel assembly and get it to fit.

 

I'm more than a little surprised at the price of a decent lathe . . .  but I can almost smell those  200 fucking euros, I want it so bad I can't give in now.

 

The lathe arrives, I machine a little metal off the inside of the retaining ring, re-profile it's outer edge and then the  inner edge of the bezel ring, and finally it all fits together perfectly. 

 

Fucking easy, like I said.

 

Bracelet next.

 

He's sent me 2 mm spring bars - guess what, they don't fit in the fucking holes in the last links of the bracelet.

 

I want my 200 fucking euros. 

 

I buy a drill press - 7 hundred and 50 fucking dollars. I read a good chuck is important - run out is your enemy. I spend $250 on a drill chuck which is guaranteed to have no more than 0.0004 mm of run out - I fucking hate run out.

I buy pure cobalt drill bits - 15 fucking dollars each.

 

I drill the last links on the bracelet out to 2 mm, the spring bars slide in like butter.

I put the bracelet on the watch and breath a sigh of relief, it's fucking over.

 

I'm thinking Vegas for a week, spend those well earned 200 euros. 

 

But no more of this modding crap for me - I'm gonna emulate my mentor from now on  - I'm gonna be a bitter and twisted cunt. 

 

Anyway, some pics of the fucking thing.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited February 19, 2018 by tripdog123

[GingerApple 7,285]

I hope you gave him his money back for taking so fucking long over it. Even Johnny Depp refunds people when he fucks up.

[HorFan 482]

Beautiful work! 200€ well earned



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[RussP 22,204]

Fascinating story.

And that watch looks bloody good. 

200 Euros well earned.

I might send you a challenge worth another article like the one above. 

[splke 4,383]

Fascinating story but mostly bullshit

 

[Luxuracer 14]

You surely did fuck up the dial ... Look at all the cracks !!!

[Glaude 1,615]

Excellent story, excellent result !

There's 35 fucking, 15 fuck, 3 cunt, 2 fuckety, 2 fucker and 0 JD, 2fake4u or SSTEEL

[aitcharGMT 0]

Meh, I've seen those from DHGate for $35 plus free shippin' and a coupon for real good "Swiss standards" drill bits     Sorry  fucking, fucking amazing story and fucking, fucking amazing work! 

[Moondustesp 136]

Great work

[Daywatch 4]

It´s not every day that You can make 200´ that easily. ..

The tale was worth it, the final result as well, looks like one of Bob´s watches:  https://www.bobswatches.com/used-mens-rolex-gmt-master-ii-coke-bezel-model-16710.html?jl_ctx=on_site&jl_labels=PDP

What´s the hole between the bezel teeth near the  coke "8" for?

[tabuktime 54]

8 hours ago, tripdog123 said:

But no more of this modding crap for me - I'm gonna emulate my mentor from now on  - I'm gonna be a bitter and twisted cunt. 

Fuckin' amateurs!

[BlackjackWQ 32]

Now that was an entertaining read. 

[hasel5 4,798]

Your a Liegend in your own bath water seen Ykelps 5513 in the flesh 

[stfrance 17]

Oh my.. a great piece.. You deserve more than 200 Euro bro..

[MAJ75 922]

An illuminating insight for those who don't really understand the passion, skill, time & pain that goes into these types of builds............

[mysterio 18]

Dang, composing the story probably took longer than the actual assembly of the watch itself. Great write up @tripdog123.

[Sifu Whitey 53]

Great story, can’t wait to read the next adventure to see what else is under the sofa cushion.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[kilowattore 2]

I don't know but I'd say the crystal looks at least 0.2mm too high...

Great write up, kind of reminds of someone

And the lathe... I recall you should have sent me one long ago

 

[Bart Cordell 0]

That’s a fucking nice work Trip !

 

[cpd2186 0]

We just played a drinking game for each time you used fuck....... We are soooo inebriated.... Beautiful watch bro!

Sent from my XT1585 using Tapatalk

[Xpletiv 16]

Those holes look pretty round to me (that's what he said).

 

You'll make a fine grandpa someday.

[deju 1,873]

Ship it by GLS in an unsealed paper envelope, or it didn't happen  

[RUSH2112 11]

My first reaction was “what the fuck were you thinking?” Then I read it again and got my answer.

[Nikosaldente 630]

Photo of the sofa?

[Jibuti 958]

you fucked it OP, dial is crooked to right, I'd want my 200 euros back if I were some guy you've never met.... and you ruined completely decent case..... if you want some profit search for few euro-cents behind sofa, you will find them....

 

lol