Baldrick 1 Posted January 4, 2011 Let's kiick it off then. Q. What's the difference between Frenchmen and toast? A. You can make soldiers out of toast. Q: How many Frenchmen does it take to defend Paris? A: Nobody knows. They've never tried. Q: What did the mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered the city in WWII? A: "Table for 100,000 monsieur?" Q: What do you call a Frenchman advancing on Baghdad? A: A salesman Q. What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up? A. The Army. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baldrick 1 Posted January 4, 2011 Q. Anyone see the French Military Rifle on eBay? A. It's never been shot and only dropped once! Q. Why don't they have fireworks at Euro Disney? A. Because every time they shoot them off, the French try to surrender. Q: Why are there so many tree-lined boulevards in France? A: Germans like to march in the shade. Q: Then why are the French chopping down the trees now? A: The Arabs like to march in the sun. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baldrick 1 Posted January 4, 2011 :zzz: Typical French reaction, asleep at the wheel DND. :zzz: Q: What does the word "Maginot" mean in English? A: "Welcome!" Q: What is the first thing the French Army teaches at basic training? A: How to surrender in at least 10 languages. Q: How can you identify a French Infantryman? A: Sunburned armpits. Q: Why does Nike like the French Army? A: Because, in war time, they are the biggest buyers of running shoes. Q: How do you stop a French tank? A: Shoot the guy that's pushing it! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spboudart 0 Posted January 4, 2011 Any new jokes during the last 60 years or did you stop living then? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baldrick 1 Posted January 4, 2011 The Napoleonic Wars: Lost. due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer. Yeah, you're the new joke, but the old ones are the best, 'cos they're true :zzz: On a final note ( final, because I mistakenly thought you were going to be a challenge ). If the French were really intelligent, they'd speak English. - Wilfred Sheed Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spboudart 0 Posted January 4, 2011 It's history just like you... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baldrick 1 Posted January 4, 2011 ..not yet mon ami, not yet and not by your hand :zzz: You've been tried and found wanting :zzz: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
prestigewatchco 2 Posted January 4, 2011 Come on Baldrick the French have some good points as well I am sure. Can't think of any off hand but they must have Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baldrick 1 Posted January 4, 2011 Come on Baldrick the French have some good points as well I am sure. Can't think of any off hand but they must have Hmmm. perhaps you're right,.. ..nope can't think of any ! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spboudart 0 Posted January 4, 2011 ..not yet mon ami, not yet and not by your hand :zzz: You've been tried and found wanting :zzz: You're really getting confused with that french of yours. Mon ami means my friend, but again if you've haven't spoke it since WWII I can understand. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baldrick 1 Posted January 4, 2011 Zeut alors, has that fargin' French ferry not left yet, ( I mean the french Channel ferry, not you, a French fairy, oh wait, yes I did ), I hope you're not gonna keep me waiting all night long, BTW, have you decided yet which of your 'man-bags' you're gonna hit me with :zzz: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spboudart 0 Posted January 4, 2011 @Robert: Nice of you to join in, as you can see I was a little bored so I had to find someone else to pick on... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
prestigewatchco 2 Posted January 4, 2011 spboudart you would be a cunt regardless of what nationality you were. The fact you are French makes it more normal thats all Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baldrick 1 Posted January 4, 2011 Picking, the only picking I can see is, you picking your nose and then picking your dangleberries. So, which 'man-bag' is gonna inflict the 'damage'. or as usual is it all talk with you Frenchies ? spboudart you would be a cunt regardless of what nationality you were. The fact you are French makes it more normal thats all Wot? you know him as well ? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spboudart 0 Posted January 4, 2011 So, which 'man-bag' is gonna inflict the 'damage'. or as usual is it all talk with you Frenchies ? I guess a wallet would be enough! But, sincerely I think it's not wise to beat up a bedridden old man! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baldrick 1 Posted January 4, 2011 But, sincerely I think it's not wise to beat up a bedridden old man! I agree, that's why I'm not busting my humph getting on a cross Channel ferry to abuse you, so why don't you drag YOUR wrinkly ass out of your bed and come across to me, or is your ass having a cigarette after all that vigorous screwing you've been doing to vent your frustration, BTW, tell her to shave her arm-pits and brush her teeth and file her hooves, her mouth smells like camel-dung, no wait, that's YOU :zzz: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spboudart 0 Posted January 4, 2011 Hairy arm pits! Is that what turn you on? Just thought that at your age you couldn't get it up anymore... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baldrick 1 Posted January 4, 2011 Just thought that at your age you couldn't get it up anymore... Oooh, très original, is that what you call 'picking' on me? Je suis blessé, vous êtes si cruel :zzz: So, tell me, soldier boy, what time is the ferry leaving, I'll meet you at the harbour, how will I know you, no, don't tell me, I'll recognise you by your perfume, how long have you marinaded in it? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spboudart 0 Posted January 4, 2011 So, tell me, soldier boy, what time is the ferry leaving, I'll meet you at the harbour... Have you reserved the ambulance yet? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
prestigewatchco 2 Posted January 4, 2011 I shouldn't worry too much Baldrick the French idea or having a battle is parking tractors on the highway and tipping rotten vegetables in the road. Not known for their courage in general Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
spboudart 0 Posted January 4, 2011 And the european living in Thailand known for having sex with boys under 10... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
prestigewatchco 2 Posted January 4, 2011 And the european living in Thailand known for having sex with boys under 10... Yes would suit you maybe you are used to arses being a turd yourself Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
greg_r 81 Posted January 4, 2011 I am touched by the air of international peace and understanding that has been displayed in this thread. :zzz: I find myself reminded of the great Flanders & Swann: Time to chill out, guys. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
