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Unknown Rolex Franken Iced Expensive Review

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McGilli

Unknown Rolex Franken Iced Expensive Review

[I don't like tagging other watch reviewers in my reviews - but I need to make an exception to show @semperfi55 not only how it's done, but what a real watch looks like]

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You have to understand.

I’m done buying watches. I have enough. My Deep Blue is my love. Done.

But.

I’m not an idiot. 

If I see a deal that’s fantastic, I’ll pull the trigger. For the investment of it really. And to show off. And brag. Hookers love braggers.

So, as luck would have it, things really, really went my way recently. 

I was at a Canadian Tire, which for those of you who don’t live in Canada - it’s not a tire. It’s actually a hardware and automotive store. Oh, and sporting goods. And bikes. And batteries. And kitchenware. And bathroom supplies. And chocolate bars. And brooms. You get the idea. Probably condoms in there somewhere too. Should be, I leave mine in the sporting goods aisle when I'm done.

So, I was leaving  the Canadian Tire with my Clorox and Drano when a van pulls up beside where I parked. When I get there the back doors of the van open and there’s this guy that comes stepping down, and out right towards me - he points at me and says “You look like a smart guy.”

-------

Instantly, I knew I could trust this fellow since he’s obviously very smart himself. I mean, he could tell I was smart from a distance. I liked him. I could tell we had a future together.

Now, before I could reply he says “Help me out my man, I got these stereo speakers. They fell off a truck, and I can’t use them since I already got a pair and home and the wife is gonna kill me if I take home another pair of these bass monsters”. 

Ah, a family man, this was turning out to be the nicest guy I’d met in a long time. Really down to Earth. Salt of the Earth.

He pointed to the speakers in the van, and I admit - they looked really awesome, except they were way too big to even fit in my Gremlin. “No, I can’t, I just could never use those” I said.

“$50 and they’re yours my man!” he said. I told him no thanks, but good luck to him and may Heaven bless his soul with tiny kisses.

So, I turn to get into my car and he says “Wait! I got something else… I don’t wanna get rid of it, but my kids gotta eat, you know they gotta eat right?”.

Wow, he has kids. I mean - this guy couldn’t be a better human. Just trying to support his kids. Damn, they have to eat. I know they do!

So, he lifts up the cuff of his shirt, and he has this gorgeous black Rolex - with diamonds!!!!! I mean, I have a Black Rolex Explorer II and I love that watch, and this was just as nice x10000000.

The problem is, I prefer stainless steel, silver. 

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He says “I got two of these, and I know since you’re so smart, you’re going to buy this for $50”.

Now it was nice. But I didn’t want black. I said “Sorry, but it’s black”.

Well, did I mention this guy was black? He got this hard stare, and the weirdest thing… He said to me “Are you telling me you have a problem with black things?” while he grabbed his crotch and was kind of squeezing that area. It looked big.

Like, I don’t know if he knew that he was doing it, but obviously, I felt bad because he thought I was a racist now.  

Funny thing though - if you’ve seen my photos then you know I’m about 28% black too. Mostly on my right arm, but my back, left arm, and right leg also. Oh, chest too.

So, I started sweating. Hard. The sweat, not me.

And as I spoke to him, I couldn’t help it, my eyes kept flicking down to his hand rubbing his crotch. And, I started sweating. Really bad…

Sweat actually ran down into my right eye as I said “No, actually I love black things [And I start winking because of the sweat], the blacker the better right?”. And I did this nervous laugh like a little girl.

So, the guy gets a big smile, walks over to me and puts his arm around me in like a hug, and while I’m 5’9” this guy is like 6’3” and he said “That’s my man, it’s time for me to break a cracker” and started guiding me towards the back of the van.

------

So, being there smart guy I am, I knew he was going to probably, maybe, kind of rape my soul, so I panicked and said “I’ll buy the watch!” And he said “$50 my man?”.

And I said “Fuck no, I’ll give you $200 for it”.

This put him into a good mood. Me too. We were obviously meant to be best friends because he made me pound his fist, then gave me a bag, and said the watch was  in there. And I could tell he was honest because he gave me his phone number to call if I ever had a problem with it. Bless his heart. And his black soul. My soul felt black too afterwards.

Here’s his van which also really put me at ease :

discount-speakers-h-625x300.jpg

 

UNBOXING

While the bag is a little unconventional, it still seems legit. The font isn’t right, but, the toilet paper is of high quality. I am pretty sure it’s like 2 ply. You can see I split it to check.

73ckgn.jpg

2vhzs0j.jpg

 

THE WATCH FROM AFAR

Have you ever bought something - then open it up - and BAM!!!!! It’s better than you thought?!?!? Well yes - this watch is ICED!!!! Obviously worth way, way more than I paid for it.

Now, before I do any close-ups I think I should show you some photos of me wearing this watch. It’s snazzy, looks fantastic and the black is wonderful with all the diamonds in it. It’s got a great shine, or gloss to it. Definitely catches the light. And the eyes of hookers. Mine even tried to snatch it off top of the dumpster last night after we finished in the sporting goods aisle at Canadian Tire.

s0v77k.jpg

21o99o6.jpg

You can really appreciate how great this watch looks in this photo.

k20a2v.jpg

 

THE WATCH CLOSE-UP

The contrast between the black PVD coating and the diamonds is really striking, fantastic I say!

2ducd9z.jpg

Ahhhhh Bleach Cleaner in the background, sorry for that. No other way this review would have gotten finished without it….

mczt6f.jpg

 

BRACELET

 

The bracelet is your traditional Rolex bracelet. Nice and flex like, with no squeaking. Works great and feels comfortable. The detail on it is amazing! I think it has SEL's but I just don't know!!!

245fozm.jpg

10ndchc.jpg

 

CLASP

The clasp is AMAZING!!!! Diamond - is what it must be made of. It’s just so awesome. I couldn’t be happier. Snaps together with a click - works as it should but just better because it’s made of diamonds.

nd7sd0.jpg

9addgg.jpg

Obviously there are no engravings on the clasp since it’s diamond! Duh!

duuzc.jpg

 

CASEBACK

The casebook has a fabulous, sexy gloss to the PVD coating. Has, from what I can tell - the usual branding on the back just like the genuine.

a47og4.jpg

54vbs5.jpg

 

DIAL

Now - the dial is a fascinating beast. The attention to detail is amazing. Just the tiny, tiny details… How do they do that? THIS - is one of the reasons this will get a lot of attention!

a0wgoz.jpg

11jytc0.jpg

 

BEZEL - BUT THIS IS THE SHOWSTOPPER!!!!!!

 

DIAMOND BEZEL!!!!!! F T W!!!!

1430ysk.jpg

zmnw3a.jpg

BTW - the bezel DOES rotate with solid clicks. High end for sure!

 

DATE WINDOW

 

Now the date window also seems to be made of Diamond!!!!!

I haven’t changed the date yet. I think it says it’s the 11th….

2uy6nhf.jpg

 

HOUR MARKERS

Fantastic. And dare I say…. DIAMOND!!!!!!!!

244a3c8.jpg

 

CROWN

DIAMOND!  Fuck, I’m going to die knowing I am so rich with all these diamonds on me….

29kquyd.jpg

 

HANDS

DIAMOND FUCKING HANDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

dnde1y.jpg

 

LUME

Finally… The part we have ALL been waiting for!!!!!!!

2dub32c.jpg

BEST LUME EVER!!!!!!!!!

 

HOW IT RUNS

So far it’s been great! Correct time, 2 times a day which is about how often I check my watch. Couldn’t ask for anything more really!

zivti9.jpg

 

HOW IT WEARS

Finally.

And Simply.

It seams like a dream. A sexy dream. A sexy super diamond dream.

14vgvn4.jpg

143mk5f.jpg

1zmlc8j.jpg

 

ROLEX EXPLORER II COMPARISON

You can tell from the following photos that I will never buy a high end replica again. The workmanship, while nice - for the price doesn’t include diamonds. And really, isn’t this new Rolex better looking?

Yes, you think it does…

1ze8h9u.jpg

e6ukw7.jpg

 

IN CLOSING.

Recently - I promised a watch to @JohnCocktoastin as his was stolen in the mail that I sent him (shite english there), I’ve let him know that the next watch I review would be his replacement. So, look forward to another review on this watch, I’m sure, in the future….

 

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RepGuy

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Glaude

:lmao: 

So... that's the 3d printed "Rolex" ... :rofl: 

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McGilli
18 minutes ago, Glaude said:

:lmao: 

So... that's the 3d printed "Rolex" ... :rofl: 

Ta-Da!!!!!

The fact though, that the clasp actually does work is pretty cool. And the bezel does rotate with all the clicks. As you know... just working some things out for the future events around here :) @Thommo82

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semperfi55
24 minutes ago, McGilli said:

No, actually I love black things, the blacker the better right?

My, my.... these reviews escalated quickly....

not-sure-if-5b9473.jpg

27 minutes ago, McGilli said:

 

k20a2v.jpg

So close.... you could've flung that watch off the balcony and won a Nobel Peace Prize for your efforts....

30 minutes ago, McGilli said:

 

dnde1y.jpg

 

Good bargain, congrats on your gen watch! Can tell because hands are 10:10 in photos! Love the guilloche dial work.  Imagine how nice it would look on fire. A song of ice and fire. Poetic. And plagiaristic.

32 minutes ago, McGilli said:

[I don't like tagging other watch reviewers in my reviews - but I need to make an exception to prove to @semperfi55 that I am as fabulous as him]

Close enough

 

Part of me wants to know what material this thing is made of..... but I think this is one of those "curiosity killed the cat" situations. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You win the internet today McGilli...

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fatarms
57 minutes ago, McGilli said:

He said to me “Are you telling me you have a problem with black things?” while he grabbed his crotch and was kind of squeezing that area. It looked big.

Out loud at "It looked big."  Bravo. :lol:

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McGilli
1 hour ago, semperfi55 said:

Part of me wants to know what material this thing is made of..... but I think this is one of those "curiosity killed the cat" situations. 

You ever seen Alien Resurrection where she finds the....  First versions?

Yeah.. there are some of those around here....

24mb2n8.jpg

It's like Frankenstien's laboratory over here right now...

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semperfi55
5 hours ago, McGilli said:

You ever seen Alien Resurrection where she finds the....  First versions?

Yeah.. there are some of those around here....

24mb2n8.jpg

It's like Frankenstien's laboratory over here right now...

Are you trying to hatch Xenomorph Hublots with them :lol:

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deju

What if on the dial you printed the markers as cut outs so Lume (or as predictive text calls it - Lumentum)  could be applied?

I think the clasp looks cool. 

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BADAPPLE

That cyclops is all wrong - spoils it.

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Thommo82
8 hours ago, McGilli said:

Ta-Da!!!!!

The fact though, that the clasp actually does work is pretty cool. And the bezel does rotate with all the clicks. As you know... just working some things out for the future events around here :) @Thommo82

So we gonna do a Thommo Watch with a big Donger hanging off it?

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Glaude
3 hours ago, Thommo82 said:

So we gonna do a Thommo Watch with a big Donger hanging off it?

I can design that, I have a tiny pecker for scale... well... that came out wrong ...

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88juniorfan

Jesus H Christ. 

I have to go to Canadian Tire this morning. 

Now, I'm NOT looking forward to the trip. 

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Thommo82
6 hours ago, Glaude said:

I can design that, I have a tiny pecker for scale... well... that came out wrong ...

Don’t put scales on my donger please 

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odoherc

Is that on the Super Rep list!

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JohnCocktoastin

OMG this is the watch you're sending me?!?  You demented, sick fuck.  Not because of the watch, but the review.  I'm gonna have nightmares now about anal rape and slipping on jizz in the sporting goods department.  I've been to Canada half a dozen times and I've never seen a Canadian Tire store, but if I ever do I will be turning around and running in the other direction.     Alright, you'll get your review, Marquis de Sade.  As soon as my therapist says I'm ready for it.  :Sick:     

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McGilli
2 hours ago, JohnCocktoastin said:

OMG this is the watch you're sending me?!?  You demented, sick fuck.  Not because of the watch, but the review.  I'm gonna have nightmares now about anal rape and slipping on jizz in the sporting goods department.  I've been to Canada half a dozen times and I've never seen a Canadian Tire store, but if I ever do I will be turning around and running in the other direction.     Alright, you'll get your review, Marquis de Sade.  As soon as my therapist says I'm ready for it.  :Sick:     

And....

I have actually decided to do something else for you because I'm so awesome.... 

BUT - I'll leave it a surprise - I think you'll enjoy it. And if not, well then I'll enjoy that.

Gimme a bit. Many of the parts are actually very, very fragile. So - I need to pack it safely.

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Logixa

Payment sent! 

You're a goddamn hero mcgilli

 

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McGilli
1 hour ago, Logixa said:

Payment sent! 

Perfect! I have received your payment of $2,800 United States Canadian Dabloons.

Before shipping, I am just posting this photo of it to prove to you it's the exact same watch I reviewed.

29cxni1.jpg

As you can see - it tells time perfectly, within 12 hours at any given time.

Beautiful 8x AR on the cyclops. So good in fact you can't even tell the date anymore.

Bezel is black to show that I don't discriminate.

It's in the mail!

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Logixa
10 hours ago, McGilli said:

Perfect! I have received your payment of $2,800 United States Canadian Dabloons.

Before shipping, I am just posting this photo of it to prove to you it's the exact same watch I reviewed.

29cxni1.jpg

As you can see - it tells time perfectly, within 12 hours at any given time.

Beautiful 8x AR on the cyclops. So good in fact you can't even tell the date anymore.

Bezel is black to show that I don't discriminate.

It's in the mail!

:rofl:

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